


like nothing but strangers now

by ㅎㅊ도 (HChnD)



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, M/M, Minor Character Death, because it is what he has been saying since feb 17th 2018, because like. it's a reincarnation au, but this is nice and cute so enjoy, can be seen as a soulmate au too, hur hyunjun instead of heo hyunjoon, i wish i had written more, probably not historically accurate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:21:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23571496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HChnD/pseuds/%E3%85%8E%E3%85%8A%EB%8F%84
Summary: Hyunjun has lived many lives, and through most of them, he'd find Haknyeon.
Relationships: Heo Hyunjoon | Hwall/Ju Haknyeon
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23





	like nothing but strangers now

**Author's Note:**

> funfact! i planned this for their FIRST birthday as the boyz together, aka in march 2018, but i procrastinated so so so damn bad and then forgot abt this and returned to work on it just now, solely because i put my wips on a hunger games generator and this was the story that won. hah. anyway i suck but i hope you enjoy this!  
> title from [call you mine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XCVM3G3pns)

Hyunjun wasn’t sure why, but at some point or another, in nearly all of his previous lives, he would find Haknyeon. 

He didn’t remember much when it was the first time. It was probably when they were both young working men back when Korea was still Goryeo and ended up crossing ways when still very young and stuck together since then. Maybe Hyunjun forgot about life much prior to that one, but it was the farthest his memory could remind of. So, for him, it was the first time he met the other. The first of many meetings that would come. 

If he recalls right, he was from a noble family. Not one with a close connection to the royal family, but not too low in the hierarchy. He had quite a comfort in life but also had duties and studies to focus on, as he was not only the oldest child but also their only boy. Not that he would complain about that, it wasn’t really a bother. It wasn’t something that really crossed his mind.

Until Haknyeon crossed his life.

It was a blur to him what he was doing prior to that moment, or the place that had happened or any detail of the circumstances. Still, Hyunjun could remember the encounter with full details even after so many other lives. 

Looking at his clothes alone, it was noticeable that he was nothing close to nobility. He was wearing comfortable, cheap robes. But with the way he smiled so brightly, shined in such an inhuman way… He felt like he had met a divine being.

“Excuse me, you’re in the way,” the by then still a stranger had politely asked him to move, probably to get whatever item was behind Hyunjun. He blinked at that, not expecting such a sweet voice, but did as told. He’d apologize if it wasn’t for his shock and awe at the other’s beauty.

It didn’t help that the other giggled and thanked him. Hyunjun just kept standing awkwardly, forgotten of what he was doing before and where to go now. Thinking back he was embarrassed at that, it was probably creepy to have someone you’ve never meet staring intensely at you.

However, that didn’t seem to bother him. The stranger kept focusing on his own task until he turned his attention back to him, that precious smile never leaving his lips. “I’m sorry for asking, but are you visiting the city? You don’t seem to be from here.”

“What?” he caught himself saying, not expecting the conversation to keep going. He cleared his throat before opening his mouth again. “I mean, yes, I’m actually from Busan. But I’ve been living around for a while now. I just don’t often go out in the centre so maybe that’s why.”

“Oh, now that you’ve said more than just a word I can hear that. That’s interesting,” the other said enthusiastically, and it sounded like he was genuinely interested in it. “I’m also from the South, like, the extreme South, so it took me a while to get fully used with the capital’s lifestyle.”

“Really? You don’t really have an accent though.”

“ _I’ve got a lot of time to practice!_ ” he said in his dialect, Hyunjun not really understanding the message. Upon seeing his face, the other laughed. “Practice. I’ve practised a lot to correct my accent.”

“Ah, that makes sense.”

Deep down, he wanted to leave. Not because he was uncomfortable with the conversation, but because he should probably return home and get things done. Still, he couldn’t _not_ stare at those black eyes and tanned skin and blinding smile. They were too captivating to look away.

“Well, if you ever want a tour around or anything like that, feel free to come up to me. I have a small shop down the road, just show up and if I’m not too busy I can make your company.”

“That’s… kind of you,” he managed to say. “I appreciate it, uhm--”

“Oh! Right, I’m Ju Haknyeon.”

 _Ju Haknyeon… what a unique name_. “Hur Hyunjun. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.”

The other walked away after biding his farewells, leaving with him a piece of Hyunjun’s heart. One that he thought he could get back, but has never seen again.

Not that he hated it. Much the opposite.

On that life, they didn’t have many opportunities to bond. He did go to Haknyeon’s shop, whenever he could, and as he had promised he would talk about the city while walking around. Sometimes, when he was too busy, Hyunjun would lend a hand and they’d chat about themselves instead. 

However, once he became of age, he had to marry a girl and move somewhere else. He hadn’t thought about telling Haknyeon that, because back then he didn’t think much about their friendship, but once time started passing he realized how deep he had fallen for him and how much he craved him.

He’s never got to tell him those feelings at that time.

Things were very different in his second life, though. He was born from a simple family, one that had too many tragedies happening, as they couldn’t afford food for all, so he caught himself in the streets wandering around more than not. It was still during Goryeo dynasty, although things were quite tense and it was close to falling. Not that it was any of Hyunjun’s worries back then. His priorities were surviving and helping his mother out.

He met Haknyeon quite late in his life. Not that he was that old - he hadn’t reached twenty yet by then - but he didn’t live much after their encounter. Thinking back, he wasn’t sure how they got acquainted with each other during this life, but he does remember that he’s always dreamed of that face, and once he found him, he never let go.

And he could only hope that the other would remember him and let him stay. But either he didn’t remember, or his mindset was too different from his. He had a simple life as well, but he didn’t have much uneventful luck as he did. Being the son of a couple of travellers, one that loved the sea, they didn’t spend much time together, at least not as much as the younger wished. But when they could meet, he had many stories to share and presents to give and had many times invited the other to travel with him. It was a nice and kind suggestion, Hyunjun thought, but it wasn’t like he could simply turn his back to his family. So he would always refuse.

In this life, he was lucky enough to tell him what he felt, and lucky enough that he shared the same thought. Still, it wasn’t something he could admit out loud on the streets. Despite being an issue, despite it being something he didn’t want to hide, he couldn’t do anything else back then. And having Haknyeon was enough. 

Until his ship sailed and never returned. That was devastating enough for Hyunjun to fall sick and pass away not long after.

On his next life, the other was his neighbour. They grew up pretty much together, and spent most of their childhood together. While he lived, he had no memories of his previous life, nor saw Haknyeon in his dreams, but he reasoned that since they were so near he didn’t crave him. But he never knew what allowed him to remember him or not, as that wasn’t the only life where he had no memories of the boy who stole a piece of his heart back in Goryeo. 

Therefore, in this life, as he could not remember how special he was, that was all that they were. Childhood friends, who at some point grew too apart and lost contact. 

Hyunjun had met him a few times, as an adult, but he was already married to someone else. Haknyeon would always be nice, attentive, allowing him to tell the stories of his family and work. In this life, the older was the one who listened more, but it wasn’t that he was as quiet as Hyunjun once was. Maybe he just didn’t want to say everything that crossed his mind. 

He never asked and never knew. But he always felt something strange whenever they said goodbye, something about the way the other’s smile had hints if sadness and how his chest ached for something he no longer had, but couldn’t even name. Something that would only ease on their next encounter, whenever that would happen in a few days, months, years, or on a new life entirely. 

Hyunjun didn’t remember all of his lives. They were too many and too different, but he knew that they could be separated into two: lives he met Haknyeon and lives he didn’t. Even if it was a brief encounter, or if their relationship wasn’t the smoothest, he would always favour the first group. 

Even when he only saw him once, as a client, or as a visitor, or as a bystander, _anything_. It was better than not meet him at all. 

Lives where he never found Haknyeon were very sad and painful to live in. Sometimes he was fully aware that his current life wasn’t his first one and would actively chase for the other, on other times that search was something unconsciously done, with no previous memory. And when his life came to an end, so far away from the one his heart loved the most, it was torture. It was a pain too miserable, worse than any heartbreak. 

Not finding Haknyeon was too insufferable. 

But, of course, those lives were compensated by the ones where Hyunjun did meet the other.

It was _marvellous_ how his mere presence calmed his soul, erased his torment, made him feel so complete. Accomplished. Even in the lives where he was a simple stranger that shared a tram, or when he was a young mail boy who happened to knock on Haknyeon’s door once, or when he bought a coffee before work and the cashier happened to be him.

Even in the lives where they couldn’t be together, where they were siblings, or had a weird age gap, or simply didn’t feel the same love from before. Just to find him was enough, sometimes.

Not all times.

And, of course, it was better when he _could_ hold him.

“Oh-- shit, I’m so sorry for stumbling on you!”, Hyunjun said in a hurry, not really staring at the other as he grabbed the books that had felt. He didn’t analyze them much, but he did notice that the one he put on top was about dreams, tilting his head. “Dreams, huh? Having nightmares or are you a psychology major?”

The question left his mouth before he could filter it, but he blamed that he was too much of an extrovert who would befriend everyone he met. At least it’s what Eric told him many times. But once he handed the pile to whoever he stumbled on, he stared at their face.

“Yeah, actually, it’s both--,” the face he’s seen countless time was smiling, but the moment their eyes crossed it melted into a thin line. Hyunjun caught himself gulping at Haknyeon’s presence. “Oh. Hello there.”

“Hey,” he tried to sound casual, but instead his voice left hoarser than usual. “Uhm. Sorry, again, for the clash. Well, if you excuse me--”

“Hyunjun-ah,” he smiled wide. “Don’t go.”

His name left the other’s mouth so naturally, he couldn’t _not_ grin wide at that. “You do remember me.”

“Of course. I know I don’t always-- Wait, do you remember me as well?”

“Yes, Haknyeon-hyung,” he said with the honorific, but then paused. “I mean. I’m not sure if you really are older than me in this life. Or if you’re really named Haknyeon.”

His long time lover smiled at him - the sweet smile that resembled a lot like the first one he had given him - and tilted his head. “Yeah, I was named the same as our first encounter in this life too. And I was born in ninety-nine. March ninth.”

“ _March ninth_?” he scoffed at that, very amused. “I can’t believe we were born on the same day this time, and even us both having the same names as back then,” he pouted. “ _And_ you’re still the hyung for one year, but that’s a shame rather than funny.”

“Woah, same day, exactly a year apart. That never happened before. It’s almost as if,” he tilted his head further, teasing smile on his lips, “as if it was destiny or something.”

That made Hyunjun giggle. “Destiny? Do you seriously believe in such a thing? How naive of you.”

“Well, how else would you explain this, Hur Hyunjun?”

He’s thought about that a lot. Why did they reincarnate so many times? And why, in most of these lives, did they reencounter? There were different eras, different people, different faces and sometimes even names… But there was always something familiar, and that was each other. Even when they looked nothing like their first life, there was still something that made them remember each other, remember what they had already lived, remember of their feelings. Sometimes it wasn’t something conscious, instead, it was something they couldn’t name, couldn’t understand. However, when they did remember clearly, did understand it well… 

Their souls were always calling each other, needing each other, finding each other. Could that really be named fate?

“Maybe that’s what they name love, Ju Haknyeon. I’ve loved you once, twice, so many times that I’ve lost count. Not having you brings me such discomfort I must chase you and have you again. And I will keep finding you until the day I no longer love you.”

He felt warmth coming from his palms, and breaking eye contact, he noticed that the older now had his hands wrapped on his own. Haknyeon looked down at the way their hands rested together, so fit to each other. “I like your answer more.”


End file.
